Saturday some of our group life coaches attended the WCA Group Life Conference. We attended at a local church in Doylestown and watched the conference via satellite feed from Chicago. It wasn’t quite the same as actually being there but we were, nonetheless, challenged and inspired.
The first session was filled with technical difficulties and we only got to see about three or four minutes as the speaker wrapped up. The first session we were able to see was presented by Mindy Caliguire who pointed to ‘the primary quality in a small group leader: A healthy Soul.’ She pointed out some of the “Symptoms of Soul Neglect” which, unfortunately, I have aquired some personal knowledge in over the years. Anger, apathy, judgmental spirit, insomnia, fear and isolation. Thankfully, Mindy pointed out some of the “Symptoms of a Healthy Soul” also. Humble confidence, safety in our relationships, clear purpose, energy and awareness to what God is doing around us. The most memorable piece of Mindy’s talk had to do with what she referred to as four zones of leadership. I’ll be tracking down her book for further learning, Discovering Soul Care. Hopefully the publisher will make it available on the Kindle. 🙂 I will not soon forget her comment: “Leadership can be dangerous to our soul.”
Dr. Henry Cloud followed next in the batting order and covered the topic of safety in group life. He covered seven ingredients to people feeling safe in a group setting. 1) They need to know the rules (that we want to address areas of hurt), 2) They need a structured path (knowing how to work through tensions for example), 3) They should have a ‘language’ (phrases that quickly get everyone on the same page, ‘last 10%’), 4) They are helping each other (intentional involvement in each others lives), 5) They see it modeled (leaders must show the way), 6) They establish group norms (a group sub-culture of expected behaviors), 7) They talk about what safe looks like (specifically defined by individuals w/o judgment).
I’ve been reading Heather Zempel’s blog for what seems like a year now. She generated some of the best comments by talking about her experience with “pig poo.” I hope she retells it in her blog because I could not do it justice. Heather’s topic: Community is messy! We can’t just say STOP to the mess in community. We must create environments where the mess becomes useful in the transformation of lives. When people grow in their faith, mess is the actual by-product. When people grow in their faith, mess is can be the catalyst for that very growth. She gave us three types of mess that exist in groups; Sin, Relational Tension/Conflict and Life mess (the uphill seasons of life). I’ll be spending some time on this and teaching these thoughts to our group life leaders!
Then it was time for lunch! Our group ran out to a small deli across the street from the courthouse. Great food!
In the always tough speaking slot – because blood is flowing to the stomach to digest food instead of keeping the brain sharp and alert – was Russ Robinson. Russ used a case study approach with live drama to illustrate the idea that leaders need more than topical and biblical knowledge, they need more than skills at facilitating a group discussion, they need “situational decision making ability.” The maturity in how to deal with the mess as is actually happens.
Bill Donahue addressed one of my personally favorite topics: Looking at Scripture in Group. He reminds us that 1) we need to study the Bible for yourself but not by yourself, 2) we should never engage the text without encountering the author, and 3) we need to read the Bible for transformation not just information. My thoughts continued to drift to how our groups can become too curriculum dependent and miss the focused study and application of biblical principles.
One of my favorite communicators, Andy Stanley finished the line up of speakers. Our groups are currently using his LO$T series with great response. Andy walked through the reasons why he is sold out to group life. He addressed Sr. Pastors frankly who want their people in groups but claim they are too busy for group life themselves: hypocrisy. Having served one of those leaders I am so happy to have a senior pastor who is committed to living out group life personally, not just corporately. It truly does make leading the local church into group life so much easier!
When I attend conferences, I tend to keep a separate page of random thoughts. I had a few but this one stands out: “You can’t be in each others lives if you only meet a couple of times a month.” Thinking it though, even once a week isn’t enough.
Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. Acts 2:46-47
Great summary, John. I can’t get away from the thought that we’ve done a disservice to our small group leaders – even deceived them – by portraying small group leadership as nothing more than “leading a Bible study” or “facilitating discussion”. Our leadership gives lip service to life-change happening through small groups, but doesn’t equip leaders to make it happen, and even “dumbs down” recruiting leaders so we think there’s not much to it. I’m feeling a sense of awe and need for dependency on God that I didn’t have before the conference!